Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: tracing shadowsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: trinityfinger
    Elite Ratio:    3.53 - 136/344/209
    Words: 236
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 855
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1510



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotstracing shadowsdots
    -------------------------------------------




    to my hands

    you trace smiles and promises
    of weekends spent, climbing

    dreamcatchers embedded in walls
    labelled forgiveness and hope.

    i stand to one side, giving what
    semblance of home still resides

    in my patchwork pavement
    journal life.

    ~

    this is all poetry and desire and the call
    to roost in trees, oblivious and carefree

    making you spin and blaze and
    furrow your shoulders

    as if this was your one and only chance
    to relieve atlas of his burden.

    ~

    we dream of forgetting loss, of praying to comets,
    not gods. they'll at least come visit us in the skies

    our necks craning for that split second it takes
    to make a wish, to hear flutes and sparrows

    and curtained auroras coming to rest
    like haloes above our heads.

    ~

    we are no angels. we smirk and snicker at gossip
    our ears should never have pricked up to hear.

    we are tears drying. we scrape for whatever reason
    to make these days go faster or slower, to end

    in joyful sighs.

    ~

    to my hands, you trace sorrow in silence.
    you make me dream, you show me hope

    you tell me there is room
    to love.




    Submitted on 2012-03-23 20:49:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      nicely done .. really very good work. usually i get distracted while reading longer poems, but this one took me away right with its own depth and flow. i loved reading it. good job. thumbs up
    | Posted on 2012-04-04 00:00:00 | by Iram | [ Reply to This ]
      
    This is beautiful Jase; you write beautifully. Need I say more?

    Well, maybe hello. I hope life's treating you well. Oh, and these lines, while the whole poem mesmerized me, absolutely floored me:

    "we dream of forgetting loss, of praying to comets,
    not gods. they'll at least come visit us in the skies"

    -Emeya.
    | Posted on 2012-04-03 00:00:00 | by Lady of Shalott | [ Reply to This ]
      Your work is so lovely. I often read it and spiral into a deep depression about my own inadequate attempts to make "art". LOL. No. Your work is so lovely I forget about everything else when I read it. I am in your moment and I revel in being there. I think I would fave every one of your pieces if it wouldn't make me look like a creepy stalker. But really, you're just that good. Sorry I don't have more to say. No dazzling input. Not just now anyway. Just enjoying being back on ES for the first time in quite some time . . . enjoying reading and being transported.
    | Posted on 2012-04-03 00:00:00 | by JanePlane | [ Reply to This ]
      at least comets come to visit us...yes, maybe we pray too high...something or someone more accessible might allow us to love.

    we wish for it...we are no angels..."we smirk and snicker at gossip"---"we are tears drying"

    we are hope...we hear there is hope. we hope it is there.

    there is room to love!

    hopefully the gossip is met by joyful sighs...

    i am in a situation of hoping and wishing the days would go by faster..long distance relationships will do that to you.

    where is that star that is close by...will we ever touch it?

    jacob
    | Posted on 2012-03-24 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    194689

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Summer of Peaches written by rev.jpfadeproof
    April 1, 2018 written by homeless
    Untitled: June 24, 2018 written by homeless
    TSC written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Buried written by MyPeriodical
    After a Dream written by KeeperOfLight
    No More Damn Love Poems written by rev.jpfadeproof
    BlackBerry Bushes written by Daniel Barlow
    Untitled - 8/2017 written by homeless
    One Time Is Good written by Daniel Barlow
    Orange written by saartha
    Exult written by saartha
    'Cause You're Mine, I Walk the Line. written by Torie
    Don't Tell Me You Love Me written by homeless
    Still written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Luchinushka written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Would You... written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Fizzy Love written by rev.jpfadeproof
    More written by homeless
    Wisp of You written by rev.jpfadeproof
    The Phoenetians and Us written by Torie
    Hurt written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Untitled 2 written by homeless
    Blinded by Sight written by Torie
    Forget written by Crestfallenman
    The Forgotten Umbrella written by garnet4david
    Roots written by Chelebel
    Jar (working title) written by rev.jpfadeproof
    X written by homeless
    Untitled - September 19, 2017 written by homeless

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry