Whispers and idle hands and too much time and I feel myself blink and suddenly it's as if I were someone else and I /feel/ her.
She brushes my cheek, my eyes, my stomach and my legs, surveying all of me with a bony and scabbed hand and I feel my soul shrink away as I externally swell.
Afraid, afraid. I've fallen into the swing of intake, but I give nothing out for fear of losing control completely. Stuck in place I can do nothing, and as anyone would know taking in too much of anything will only make you bloat. My eyes look puffy and round and I'm exhausted but I find myself chewing on my nails or spinning pointless circles in thought, all contradiction and no help.
I'm exhausted. More tired than I could ever explain, than I could ever articulate. My entire soul feels raw and useless and tonight I just wish I was someone else. Someone without feeling and without people. I don't know if I've ever been so sad.