[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Sacrificedots

    Author: keestu
    ASL Info:    32/male/Sydney
    Elite Ratio:    5.61 - 153/95/116
    Words: 217
    Class/Type: Poetry/Sorry
    Total Views: 697
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1224

       Ten reasons of death

    1. Old age
    2. Wrath
    3. solitude
    4. Emptiness
    5. Despair
    6. Destruction
    7. Intoxication
    8. Insanity
    9. Greed
    10. Sacrifice

    Tenth -- Sacrifice
    Finally I reach my deadline and my final thoughts before settling down to an endless demise. I look back at myself drowning my happiness in dark waters and walking the path that i never wanted to.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    I thought she would hold my hand...
    I hoped she would hug my cry...
    I smiled like a fool to see that she never existed.

    Happiness I see you over there,
    drowning in your own tears.
    The other nine stood there beside you
    reminding of how fake on you is the hope that bears.

    You fight again with me in that same false hope,
    of finding the one that never exists.
    You smile with a tear and look at all,
    of whom they do not have a tear to dry.

    So did I drown you in those dark waters,
    of my heart thinking that the pain will go away.
    But you yet rise and ask,
    Why is it that you are still alive?

    I walk thy by side,
    looking at nothing but the truth,
    For I have left all of you to haunt,
    this heart of mine till I die.

    I'll tell you the truth....

    I am a freak among normal people around me as they claim.
    I am a speck in this tiny world large enough to endure all the pain.
    I long for love that never existed since I was a child.
    I find myself on a road never once again in a while and for the last time......alone....

    Submitted on 2012-03-30 22:29:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I like it :) .. you seem to do a similar thing that I do and that is have a skeleton to work with and then add the accesssries and body along the way.. it gives a finished shine... I enjoy poems (and songs) that speak of opposites, in this case a form of happiness whit h ended in sadness.. there's something about comparing 'deatg' and 'life's or ' boy's andy ' girl' that appeals to me. To find a love that never existed as a child, is my favorite line.. I do hope that you find it someday.. good luck to you and beautiful words!
    | Posted on 2012-03-31 00:00:00 | by dannyshyboy | [ Reply to This ]
      Not a very good poem I'll say it myself...but wanted to express the path as a sacrifice I make in life...either way...the last reason of my death....sacrifice..(Sacrifice happiness to get everything else)
    | Posted on 2012-03-30 00:00:00 | by keestu | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    The Promise written by annie0888
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Push written by JanePlane
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    To written by SavedDragon
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Incubus written by monad
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Wavelength written by saartha




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]