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    dots Submission Name: Perception Deceptiondots

    Author: Blue Monk
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 1556/457/118
    Words: 68
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 768
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 420

       I'm working the "one a day for a month" thing but I don't know how or if I can do that yet.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPerception Deceptiondots

    Once when we were very young
    it centered on ourselves
    to capture all eternity
    and place it on our shelves

    To me to me we all agree
    a trough to ego bloat
    and sense the world through senses that
    stay horny as a goat

    But senses always lie to us
    perception loves to fool
    too late too late we over ate
    forgetting every rule

    Submitted on 2012-04-09 16:00:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      The rhythm of this is very good. Propels one along very nicely. It is jovial in its attitude, which I enjoyed and its meaning resonates. A good piece.
    | Posted on 2013-07-20 00:00:00 | by CNPerry | [ Reply to This ]
      Bravo, Lloyd!
    It's fantastic that you've taken up such a challenge...I have an idea that you know what to do and will do it well.
    This is a prime example.
    You've got the rhythm and rhyme down without the singsong side-effect (which I always seem to get)
    and your sentiments are wise and cleverly presented.

    I'm looking forward to the rest of April...
    | Posted on 2012-04-09 00:00:00 | by latentlylyrical | [ Reply to This ]
      we overindulge on ourselves, but underindulge doing for others...

    the bloated feeling can be very uncomfortable...

    i like the poem's message...(at least as i see it)

    and i like how it snuck up on me, not heavy handed at all....

    and placing eternity on OUR shelves....that is a lot of pressure to protect that possession...too much...we need to share it with others.

    | Posted on 2012-04-09 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      The second stanza made me laugh, especially that last line.

    I am so pleased people are doing NaPo. It makes me feel like part of some secret community.
    | Posted on 2012-04-09 00:00:00 | by saartha | [ Reply to This ]

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