Following Me by eggshells

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dots

<< | >>

Submission Name: Following Me dots

--------------------------------------------------------

Author:	eggshells
ASL Info:	23/M/WA
Elite Ratio:	3.19 - 29/75/68
Words:	124

Class/Type:	Lyrics/Serious
Total Views:	756
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	915

Description:

Following Me dots

-------------------------------------------

Monday night,
My baby left me.
Tuesday night,
Sent me her key.

I suppose I'll never know
Just what demon is
Following me.

Wednesday night,
Found I had not one kid,
But three.
Thursday night,
Signed her off away from me.

I suppose I'll never know
Just what demon is
Following me.

Friday night,
My work asked me to leave.
Saturday night,
No money for rent,
Cause I'm not working.

I suppose I'll never know
Just what demon is
Following me.

Sunday night,
I left that place,
Traveled into the black

Left that demon in the dust,
Cleared my mind of rust,
And I ain't ever lookin' back.

fin fin fin
Eggshells

Submitted on 2012-05-20 20:51:15 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
sometimes we just get a streak of bad...and it just keeps following us around...won't let go.

but i like that the speaker shrugs it off and says..."i'll never look back"---

probably best that way...looking forward is the way to go.

i liked the personification of "work" in that line..."work asked me to leave"

nice phrasing there.

jacob
| Posted on 2012-05-21 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece? 7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

195176

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.
Date night written by expiring_touch
In My Head written by faideddarkness
Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
Incubus written by monad
Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
Push written by JanePlane
4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
Wavelength written by saartha
Song written by Daniel Barlow
cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
What happens written by Wolfwatching
Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
To Glow written by krs3332003
Wish written by Daniel Barlow
Whiteout written by layDsayD
Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
Bond written by saartha
Munyonyo written by expiring_touch

Enter your search terms Submit search form

Web www.eliteskills.com

[ Quick Signup ]
[ Lost Password ]

January 10 07
131,497 Poems
Posted

I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

[ Angst Poetry ]
[ Cutters ]
[ Famous Poetry ]
[ Poetry Scams ]

FontSize:
[ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.