Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Aladdin's Dilemmadots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: rws
    ASL Info:    57/m/ohio
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 2777/1297/258
    Words: 131
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Misc
    Total Views: 860
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1111



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAladdin's Dilemmadots
    -------------------------------------------


    Wish I could live
    In a movie world
    Guttin’ all the villains
    As I save the girl

    Wish I could ride
    In a fancy car
    Stocked with the best
    Like a rollin’ bar

    Wish I was sly
    As a wealthy gent
    Livin’ off the dole
    Of the government

    Wish I could crash
    In a sprawlin’ home
    Frontin’ some respect
    With a fine-tooth comb

    Wish I could master
    All the sickest moves
    And let the also-rans
    Bitch about the rules

    Wish there were wishes
    Tall enough to dream
    Until that day comes
    Let the whole world sing –

    Hey-noni-noni-noni-noni-noni-na-na
    Hey-na-na-na-na-na-na
    Hey-noni-noni-noni-noni-noni-na-na
    Hey-na-na-na-na-na-na

    A little bit of nothin’
    Just sorta stings
    Burn it all down
    Join hands and sing…

    Hey-noni-noni-noni-noni-noni-na-na
    Hey-na-na-na-na-na-na
    Hey-noni-noni-noni-noni-noni-na-na
    Hey-na-na-na-na-na-na




    Submitted on 2012-05-22 13:25:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      So at my count, you've got six wishes here. The genie traditionally gives only three. So that's Aladdin's dilemma - how to handle a greedy wisher? Lol

    You need to hand this one over to Paul Simon or Jason Mraz, put a little pop tune to it with a reggae backbeat. As always, I love your work!

    Annie
    | Posted on 2012-10-07 00:00:00 | by annie0888 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is fun stuff. It seems very "rappy". I can almost see the video in my mind.

    My favorite lines:

    A little bit of nothin’
    Just sorta stings

    Yep, this is bold and provocative and speaks to the want that is created from just seeing this type of lifestyle exalted and romanticized on TV and in the movies. And through music, of course.

    And yet, as Jacob points out, what would it really feel like? Would it bring a sense of depth and understanding to our lives? Would it create joy, bring inner peace? Evidence seems to be to the contrary. How many stars and people with money end up with drug habits, or commit suicide or have eating disorders or mental illness, alcoholism? "Things" don't seem to quell demons. In fact, at times they seem to fuel the demons' fires.

    Just sayin' . . .

    Good write, though. I enjoyed it.
    | Posted on 2012-06-16 00:00:00 | by JanePlane | [ Reply to This ]
      i too wish i could do all these things...at least for one day, just to say i could and did...then i would want to go back to being little ole me.

    you phrase so smoothly...seems effortless...but carries so much zing.


    jacob
    | Posted on 2012-05-23 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    195195

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Cover written by saartha
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Records I written by Raphael
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Shi written by ShyOne
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    prison written by ShyOne
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Shut Up written by annie0888

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry