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    dots Submission Name: A Ponderdots

    Author: girly101
    Elite Ratio:    3.79 - 292/310/149
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 420
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 719


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Ponderdots

    People are creatures of sin
    Of selfishness and deceit
    And though I try to be only good
    Darkness seems a friend I often greet

    These are not words of sadness
    Of depression, self loathing, and doubt
    They are the words of girl who is wondering
    What this life is really about

    By nature we are all evil
    Self preservation is a trait ingrained
    But as soon as we begin thinking
    We realize these traits mustn't be retained

    Why is our natural form something to be drained?
    If we are born broken then why do we try
    To live in this world
    Where each day we must lie?

    Submitted on 2012-06-12 22:37:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Hmmm. You have the "T" in TULIP down! Theological commentary aside...

    I actually like this. But only if it's the opening of a bigger piece. I want to see a developmental arc. You wallow in the mire but never imply you'll even attempt to stand up. I want to see that effort. That's where your humanity can really shine! So, you beleive we are all inherently bad. If that were all then enjoy the hedonism or end it all! But you don't think that's ALL we're about. If I'm right, then take me somewhere! Let me watch your transformation! Not in a "born again" sense, but more the "Prodigal son" sense. He literally found himself in the mud with the pigs. But rose! Show me that and you may have something to REALLy share!
    | Posted on 2012-06-13 00:00:00 | by _n3pt | [ Reply to This ]

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