[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: PaPadots

    Author: _n3pt
    Elite Ratio:    4.68 - 156/107/13
    Words: 192
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 502
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1215

       I've always felt the script format to seem poetic (or could be). I've been toying with it for some time now, capturing conversations and moments in life. Let me know what you think. I hope it pushes the medium.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Asher, 7
    Me, beyond 7

    The child is engaged in an act of building block construction

    I am engaged in an act of survival, dodging traffic, keeping us alive

    ASHER: Terrorists blew up the 2 towers.
    ME: Yup. That was really sad.
    ASHER: Are there still terrorists?
    ME: Unfortunately, but we have highly trained soldiers fighting a war trying to stop them.
    ASHER: Did you ever fight in a war?
    ME: No, but my grandfather fought in World War 2.
    ASHER: Did he fight terrorists?
    ME: He fought Nazis. Which are kinda like terrorists only worse. And better dressed.
    ASHER: What was his name?
    ME: I called him "PaPa."
    ASHER: No, what was his REAL name?

    I started to cry.
    I hadn't thought about my grandfather for a long (too long) time.
    And here was my son asking about a man he never knew.

    ASHER: What's wrong?
    ME: Nothing. His name was Carlis. And he was a great and brave man.
    ASHER: That's right. I've heard his name before.

    The conversation then turned to Lego's and video games.

    Submitted on 2012-06-13 10:45:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
    | Posted on 2012-06-16 00:00:00 | by robertbwell | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Push written by JanePlane
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Linger written by saartha
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Bond written by saartha
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    To Glow written by krs3332003




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]