Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password


Author: _n3pt
Elite Ratio:    4.68 - 156 /107 /13
Words: 192
Class/Type: Poetry /Serious
Total Views: 1059
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1215


I've always felt the script format to seem poetic (or could be). I've been toying with it for some time now, capturing conversations and moments in life. Let me know what you think. I hope it pushes the medium.


Asher, 7
Me, beyond 7

The child is engaged in an act of building block construction

I am engaged in an act of survival, dodging traffic, keeping us alive

ASHER: Terrorists blew up the 2 towers.
ME: Yup. That was really sad.
ASHER: Are there still terrorists?
ME: Unfortunately, but we have highly trained soldiers fighting a war trying to stop them.
ASHER: Did you ever fight in a war?
ME: No, but my grandfather fought in World War 2.
ASHER: Did he fight terrorists?
ME: He fought Nazis. Which are kinda like terrorists only worse. And better dressed.
ASHER: What was his name?
ME: I called him "PaPa."
ASHER: No, what was his REAL name?

I started to cry.
I hadn't thought about my grandfather for a long (too long) time.
And here was my son asking about a man he never knew.

ASHER: What's wrong?
ME: Nothing. His name was Carlis. And he was a great and brave man.
ASHER: That's right. I've heard his name before.

The conversation then turned to Lego's and video games.

Submitted on 2012-06-13 10:45:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


| Posted on 2012-06-16 00:00:00 | by robertbwell | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?