Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Onedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: johnbegone92
    Elite Ratio:    5.41 - 11/3/3
    Words: 128
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 863
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 701



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Onedots
    -------------------------------------------


    As soon as I met her, I knew she was the one.
    A childish, mental list in my head begun.
    Wed get to know each other, Id take her out on dates.
    Id dress up and Ill make sure that I was never late.
    Id make her laugh, see that gorgeous smile,
    Id tell her I never felt this way about anyone in a while.
    Wed dance until dawn to our favorite song.
    Wed lie next to each other all night long.
    Id hold her hand and kiss her, if shed let me,
    Then maybe, just maybe, shed finally see.
    That were meant for each other, wed never part.
    Now all I has to do is get rid of the other man
    Thats captured her heart.




    Submitted on 2012-06-21 11:07:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      lol its so cute till its kinda twisted at the end, typical john! aha nice but if youre giving it to someone, cut that last part
    | Posted on 2012-06-21 00:00:00 | by simpleandgreen | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    195413

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry