Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Thoughts on Sartredots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: expiring_touch
    ASL Info:    30/f/Hamburg
    Elite Ratio:    4.03 - 137/243/158
    Words: 83
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 658
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 535



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThoughts on Sartredots
    -------------------------------------------


    And I am trapped, with no way out
    Of my mirror, itís crippled into my face Ė
    Just take the shard and slide it lightly
    across
    my neck and wrists.
    Watch how the life lines
    Pulse into the summer wind that only issued
    One drop to hit the darkened figure
    Of an age-old sage, he knew much more
    And didnít tell, because though knowing one
    And not knowing the other,
    Discerning differences into the night:
    The tragic dissonance of an acquired freedom.




    Submitted on 2012-07-22 15:47:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I like the material (I think) but found the structure to be a but taxing. There should be a way to smooth this out quite a bit. If Dale doesn't like Sartre and would rather avoid such thoughts judiciously, it might be an aversion to things dry.
    | Posted on 2012-07-26 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this one I just do not get the Sartre reference. I suppose that is partly because I do not understand why anyone would want to have thoughts on Sartre.
    | Posted on 2012-07-22 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    195585

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Incubus written by monad
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Giving written by jjd
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    To written by SavedDragon
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    This written by Chelebel
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Break Up written by WriteSomething

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry