Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Sailing Throughdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BlazeFlamme
    ASL Info:    22/m/TX
    Elite Ratio:    1.81 - 23/160/138
    Words: 177
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 466
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1173



    Description:
       Been on the water for 2 months, now (minus 8 days in france and greece). Several more to go... miss my wife.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSailing Throughdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I felt the sun kiss the waters
    Once again last night
    And though naught was seen
    Through my homesick dreams
    I know you felt it too

    And I almost wouldn't bother
    Catching up on sleep
    Though my world may rock and sway
    And I'm thousands of miles away
    At night I escape to you

    But the sky's dearest lover
    Soon rises high
    When all the darkness fades
    Reality succumbed from day
    Where forever feels a humble thing

    Because the distance is far too far
    Creeping clock's big hand
    It teases and runs at night
    Just to skulk in broad daylight
    While my heart lies next to you

    And sometimes I want to scream
    Give in to whatever fate
    But helpless times brood feebleness
    An empty array of different ways
    To hurry home to you

    So my soul may ache for now
    My body beaten down
    Callus, blister, cramp and stitch
    The only way to cross that bridge
    Is to face daylight, drudge through
    Until my ship sails home, back to you.




    Submitted on 2012-08-17 13:37:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      "where forever feels like a humble thing"

    really like that line...this is so touching..forlorn, yet hopeful the next wave will bring me back to my love...

    i am in a long distance relationship..and really felt this...it punctuates the feeling so well..

    sounds a bit like Poe

    "Helen, thy beauty is to me, like those Nicean barks of yore, that gently oer a perfume sea, the weary wayworn wanderer bore, to his own native shore"

    nice

    jacob
    | Posted on 2012-08-17 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    195773

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Shi written by ShyOne
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Cover written by saartha
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Dream written by closetpoet
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry