Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Sailing Throughdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BlazeFlamme
    ASL Info:    22/m/TX
    Elite Ratio:    1.81 - 23/160/138
    Words: 177
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 512
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1173



    Description:
       Been on the water for 2 months, now (minus 8 days in france and greece). Several more to go... miss my wife.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSailing Throughdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I felt the sun kiss the waters
    Once again last night
    And though naught was seen
    Through my homesick dreams
    I know you felt it too

    And I almost wouldn't bother
    Catching up on sleep
    Though my world may rock and sway
    And I'm thousands of miles away
    At night I escape to you

    But the sky's dearest lover
    Soon rises high
    When all the darkness fades
    Reality succumbed from day
    Where forever feels a humble thing

    Because the distance is far too far
    Creeping clock's big hand
    It teases and runs at night
    Just to skulk in broad daylight
    While my heart lies next to you

    And sometimes I want to scream
    Give in to whatever fate
    But helpless times brood feebleness
    An empty array of different ways
    To hurry home to you

    So my soul may ache for now
    My body beaten down
    Callus, blister, cramp and stitch
    The only way to cross that bridge
    Is to face daylight, drudge through
    Until my ship sails home, back to you.




    Submitted on 2012-08-17 13:37:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      "where forever feels like a humble thing"

    really like that line...this is so touching..forlorn, yet hopeful the next wave will bring me back to my love...

    i am in a long distance relationship..and really felt this...it punctuates the feeling so well..

    sounds a bit like Poe

    "Helen, thy beauty is to me, like those Nicean barks of yore, that gently oer a perfume sea, the weary wayworn wanderer bore, to his own native shore"

    nice

    jacob
    | Posted on 2012-08-17 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    195773

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Every..... written by jackz
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Whiteout written by layDsayD
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    written by Daniel Barlow
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    Linger written by saartha
    The Promise written by annie0888
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Push written by JanePlane
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry