Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: korudots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: trinityfinger
    Elite Ratio:    3.53 - 136/343/209
    Words: 122
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 570
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 815



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotskorudots
    -------------------------------------------




    synchronicity
    between endless rain
    and the curve of your
    voice

    i
    will forget
    all of this tomorrow
    being monday
    and a stony deliverance
    of impromptu games
    and handshakes given
    when there is only
    emptiness
    on my part

    only
    being an invention
    of half-formed notes
    and crescent moons
    i've stumbled under
    here in winter fog
    and searchlights
    tracing sand
    and fingers
    rippling
    over flax

    halos crushed
    between this day
    and the next

    wind and denial
    a futile breath

    stones shiver
    and blue
    becomes
    brown




    Submitted on 2012-09-02 09:36:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      and this probably is the lamest comment ever...because emwren basically said exactly what i was feeling when i read this...

    so ditto her comment

    and you have mine.

    jacob
    | Posted on 2012-09-06 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      There are many lines in this poem that stoke the fire of my imagination and make me want to go write right now.

    ...endless rain
    and the curve of your voice

    Is just a fantastic way to open, but it really only gets better bit by bit

    the formatting is quite nice also, it kind of looks like a side view of someone lying curved on a bed or couch...lovely poem.
    | Posted on 2012-09-05 00:00:00 | by emwren | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    195900

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Carry written by saartha
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    The World written by jjd
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    Love written by saartha
    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry