[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: The Daisies and The Daffodils dots

    Author: DaleP
    ASL Info:    57/M/TX
    Elite Ratio:    6.21 - 629/553/330
    Words: 429
    Class/Type: Prose/Satire
    Total Views: 526
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2779


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Daisies and The Daffodils dots

    Buffeted at whim by a churlish wind,
    Gusting from the black hole of time.
    The tiniest seeds came at last to rest
    Upon a fallow ball spinning 'round a
    Golden sun. They crept out of the ground
    one night, vicious things with dark designs,
    To control the wayward woman's mind.
    Using fluttery petal charms they
    Insinuated themselves
    Like lovers in her arms.

    Oh black diabolical mind control, doth
    A cracked bell toll, for every lithesome
    Lass clutched now in a sordid Mass.
    O' how the perfume-spray-narcotic flows,
    While a callow effluence grows,
    Much to the consternation of all
    free and innocent Men. Men who gaze
    In stupefaction and just cannot but keen
    In torment, at this change of demeanor.

    How little do all men know? For 'tis
    the Daisies and the Daffodils, that lurk
    atop yonder rolling hills, who have replaced
    Them in sweet love's affections.
    How could he know? For is this evil not
    Disguised as dainty decorations. Who
    Would believe they are maniacally plotting
    The vilest of wills? Having infiltrated gardens
    And even been placed in tiny earthen pots!

    The better to control their thralls while
    awaiting and anticipating that glorious day.
    When the reign of the chilling flower buggers,
    Blossoms throughout the chosen land.
    Then these cackling monster flowers will hold
    The reins of power, and thus the ruin and
    ruination will begin, over an enthralled and
    subjugated man. O' the Daisies and
    The Daffodils have spread beyond yonder
    Hills. It is by the thinnest whisker on my
    Chin, I have escaped a mortal blow.

    I overheard the evil buggers conspiring with
    A winsome wench, appalled I gasped "no! "
    And luckily my fleet feet carried me
    Beyond their clinging clasp. Seeking refuge
    In a in a slimy cave by the sea. I await my death
    in trepidation. For I know I was seen.
    I am making one last desperate try before I die,
    To enlighten everyone. But I fear it is too late.
    Yet still I pen this missive with my blood,
    Upon a piece of fabric torn from vestment
    Cloth. In the hope that any who might find and read
    These words be warned, and hearken
    Quickly before the final hour that man
    Be spared an unholy fate. "Oh God no!"
    I sense a presence of a cloying essence I
    Must once more flee

    (manuscript found in a cave by a thrall of the flower queen)

    Submitted on 2012-09-22 00:14:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This has always been one of my more favorite ones of yours and I still so like it.
    | Posted on 2012-10-23 00:00:00 | by ponykeeper | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh yeah... another masterpiece to feed our fears. Seeded one way or another we are obviously doomed.

    | Posted on 2012-09-22 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a great warning Dale, but there's no escape. The queen has plotted a scheme with her well manicured nails.
    And I like the effect this poem on me, this was chanting. The subtleness of daisies and daffodils being that of a woman. And love is dangerous, that what she brings.

    I like how the first stanza exudes force and resilience and on the last one it spoke of weakness and somewhat a plea. its like viewing two sides and seeing through each and connecting.

    "To control the wayward woman's mind" I like this one, it depicts her unpredictable ways that someone you want to handle.
    I also like this "sordid Mass", it could be anything, wonderful imagery you bring here.

    ...and not all men are innocent, only a few. Men break hearts like bones.

    | Posted on 2012-09-22 00:00:00 | by jeniecel | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    untitled written by Chelebel
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Whiteout written by layDsayD
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Linger written by saartha
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    To written by SavedDragon
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]