I can imagine being dropped into an unfamiliar country with diametrically opposed customs is difficult, even if you are familiar with the language. I have visited several European countries, but it was only a visit and not long enough to really immerse in the culture. This was written with a lot of strong voice, and your despair comes through loud and clear without turning off the reader. That is because you still have the aura of strength running through the voice. I will have to read more and hope you start posting more.
This reminds me of how it feels to have lost part of yourself. It seems you had that special someone in your life that cared about you and believed in you but you didn't believe in yourself. That is one of the most hardest feelings to deal with. The imagery you gave throughout this entire piece was simple perfection