[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: at the end of the county fairdots

    Author: pioneerheart
    Elite Ratio:    4.51 - 204/205/140
    Words: 255
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Venting
    Total Views: 612
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1485

       Random energy enlightened;saddens

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsat the end of the county fairdots

    As the ancient calendar tick tocked louder as the days approached, it became more apparent.
    Clarity was showing it's harsh truth, like a winter for the haggard old ones.
    The blues have slowed you down.
    The world is upside-down.
    The human spirit sighs, when no answers arise.
    And in the end days of the county fair the crowds bustled along hurrying to fill their shopping days with pleasure to find the modern snake oil to fill their lives from the void of their existence.
    If you listen closely in the southeast wing of building 4, you can hear a mother whisper to her new young adult daughter why she should complete the application for the privledge to vote.
    The rebellion was subtley expressed by her remark.
    The same remark her mother once held and believed.
    What difference can I make, I am powerless?
    My opinion is of a mutant.
    Then, everyone went back to their places and I awoke from the dream only to be enlightened by Hector of what I wouldn't dare admit aloud. There is an invisible veil of lies.
    It's a sugar coated classification, mummification of lies.
    Regarding everything that what which we supposedly stand for, prejudice is alive and well.
    You are not free, this your hell.
    Some have privledge, and depending of the color of your skin, you secretly get and things come easier, while you suffer so you make them suffer so...so be it.

    Submitted on 2012-09-30 06:27:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Quite a depth here. Intensity begets art.

    | Posted on 2012-10-01 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      "hurrying to fill their shopping bags with pleasure"

    we get it while we can, the fair only lasts a few days and then it is gone...

    there are some rough spots in this but i like the intensity of theme...

    | Posted on 2012-09-30 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]