Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Lostdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jjd
    ASL Info:    20/male/Griffin, Ga.
    Elite Ratio:    2.18 - 20/78/35
    Words: 71
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1267
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 359



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLostdots
    -------------------------------------------


    As the sun dimmed down, the moment of our time escapes the face of the earth, it tries to find the middle ground.
    I walk through the emptiness of whats left of the world. Farther and father through time i can't find whats part of me.
    As I fall into the black hole of whats within me, I see no end.
    Forever lost, forever no light




    Submitted on 2012-10-08 15:47:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      K first, do you wish to fiddle with your poetry at all. Would you be interested in buffing stuff up format wise or flow...anything?
    Or do you just prefer thoughts and comments on the piece?

    Good stuff to know. For future reference.

    This was heartfelt in the way I hear your anguish and feelings of isolation.

    As the sun dimmed down, the moment of our time escapes the face of the earth, it tries to find the middle ground

    The thought is clear and it is clever...our time escapes the face of the earth...is this a past love or of breaking up or are you saying our is in everyone collectively?

    Hmm

    I would like to help you just tighten this up a bit..it is a diamond in the rough...polishing will bring forth the shine

    Peace yo!

    Kelly
    | Posted on 2014-06-02 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ]
      This is great ! Definitely something I can relate to . Now , I see this as a way of you saying you're lost in yourself ? Which is EXACTLY how I feel right now ! Of course , that's just how I interpreted it . Great write , keep it up !
    | Posted on 2012-10-08 00:00:00 | by unwantedlove20 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    196185

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    Linger written by saartha
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    This written by Chelebel
    Giving written by jjd
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry