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    dots Submission Name: Heaven isn't too fardots

    Author: TalentedChild
    ASL Info:    17
    Elite Ratio:    1.85 - 19/81/106
    Words: 435
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 521
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2265

       very sleepy so could use some revising, so keep that in mind. Any errors you spot let me know.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHeaven isn't too fardots

    Today was another day but the routine wasnít new,
    I did the same thing yesterday and the day before too,
    I go to work and come home and relax in my bed,
    But before I can unwind I think of the life that I have led.
    My knees get weak, and my arms get sore,
    I work so much, I donít have much time for anything anymore.
    But oneís thingís for sure that when my day is through
    I take a second and I stop and think of you.
    You used to tell me how proud you were of the woman Iíve become
    And when I picture your face my body becomes numb.
    It should feel good to think of the good times we shared, but I canít help but think How you left really just isnít fair.
    I know it would hurt you to see my heart torn into too, but trust me when I say this Itís because I was better near to you.
    You were my living angel, a diamond in the sky, you were everything a mother should have been
    And why youíre gone I just canít seem to understand why.
    Although I sit here with so much regret, you have taught me a lot of courage through the things you have said.
    "You canít take life for granted, because people come in as fast as they go,
    And you will be sad if they donít get to see you grow."
    Your life will go on, but youíll be empty when there away,
    And you wonít get a second chance to say the things you need to say.
    When you want to sing with them your favorite song, or go cuddle with them when the nights get to long, you wonít have them there.
    When you want a hug that will make everything alright, they wonít be there to hold you tight.
    So make the most out of your time, and appreciate what you got, because that is what my mother has taught.
    Itís been a hard fight thatís for sure, but I wonít give up because she knows the cure. When the fight gets to tough, she will give me strength in my legs to stand, and when I'm too tired, I know she will still be there holding my hand.
    Life's not always an easy path she would say, but in the end all you really can do is pray. And at night when I look up a sky and see that diamond star, I can finally learn that hey heaven isnít too far.

    Submitted on 2012-10-10 23:47:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Prepositions,let your words leave space for your readers to fill up with their imagination.you are a great poet for you too understand your emotions
    | Posted on 2012-10-19 00:00:00 | by kingsley | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey nice work the imagery was great and the delivery on point but it sounded like a letter and not a poem.This happens when the poet puts too many emotions into one poem.Here is what I think you should do, quit using so many conjuctions and -
    | Posted on 2012-10-19 00:00:00 | by kingsley | [ Reply to This ]

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