[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Not Poetry But Intimationsdots

    Author: Snow9
    Elite Ratio:    3 - 38/21/17
    Words: 203
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Passion
    Total Views: 913
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1201

       An experimental piece to accommodate to my short-comings. I fancy it a proto-poem.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsNot Poetry But Intimationsdots

    View 1:
    Looking outside from the teacher-abandoned classroom, crows bathing on tree-tops in rain. Think: a body of meat and feather suspended midair as if it were nothing, gliding through nothing. Still amazes common sense despite logic.

    View 2:
    The watery pitch road reflects my umbrella-holding silhouette in the sky. And now the muddy footpath marbles whose edges are traced by the rolling water.

    What I present is not poetry, but montages of a mass of experience juggling, nurturing which can be sprung out fine strands of beauty. But that's an art that half-eludes my vision. It's just a pureness in rain that washes up reality, that I can't give words to.

    View 3:
    A rain soaked foggy window cleared by occasional trickles of drops, viewing which I write. Think: what poetry can come out of this? Shapes outside cannot be made out, but blurry patches of abstract colours- red, green and all- mingling into each other.
    Now water multiplies water as I catch glimpse of the lake through the water. Now the man besides window brushes the glass to look at the girl outside.... I feel an urge for vertigo.

    Submitted on 2012-10-12 06:14:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      there is such pureness in the rain, but then it hits the ground, washes up into floods that contain the impurities of the earth ---

    it is like stephen king said in "on writing"---

    the best part of writing is when we just get a piece down on paper, we have created something, and no one yet has seen it...once it is read, it can be torn apart, critiqued, whatever,

    but when it first pours from our mind, heart, pen....it is pure.

    | Posted on 2012-10-12 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Giving written by jjd
    One Day written by WriteSomething
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    True Death written by layDsayD
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Dashboard Light written by layDsayD
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Every..... written by jackz
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Linger written by saartha
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Alone in the Crowd written by SavedDragon
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]