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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A Blink of an Eyedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jjd
    ASL Info:    20/male/Griffin, Ga.
    Elite Ratio:    2.18 - 20/78/34
    Words: 99
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nature
    Total Views: 848
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 562



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Blink of an Eyedots
    -------------------------------------------


    A melody plays while the wind blows. "Whats that beautiful sound?.... AHHH, Its the tress that sing joyful music for all to hear!"

    As the children laugh, plays, and Dance in a circle, The melody plays louder while the children get older.

    Soon the music stops and so do they. For they are to old for joy. A last melody plays softly and the old lay to rest.

    While they start to lie on the ground, they have flash backs. They hadn't realize life shall pass you by.

    All is gone and at rest.




    Submitted on 2012-10-12 18:50:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      Top line tress = trees?

    In the second to last sentence should that be realized? I don't like how that sentence flows. I personally would make it "They hadn't realized that life would pass them by" only because that "you" throws it off from the rest, Unless maybe you did
    They hadn't realized "Life shall pass you by."
    as if it was a quote.

    I liked reading it this, it wasn't to detailed to put an image in my head, it let me create one,
    | Posted on 2012-10-13 00:00:00 | by PryncessVynom | [ Reply to This ]


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