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    dots Submission Name: Maiden in Full Bloomdots

    Author: irrelevantme
    Elite Ratio:    2.91 - 83/89/62
    Words: 63
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 945
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 429

       I don't know . . .

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMaiden in Full Bloomdots

    City walks with elegant stride,
    of a stripling burgundy rose,
    where sweet fragrance abides,
    held back gazes that wander off;

    a small smile,

    refract her silent cries
    and the sad ocean of diamonds from her eyes
    sparkled in time with the light of the moon
    engulfed within the sigh's of unspoken gloom

    when smiles and sorrow go hand in hand.

    Submitted on 2012-11-01 04:04:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
    Everybody writes about love, but not so much about love as about somebody who is in love, or not in love, or waiting to be in love, or recovering from being in love, or disappointed at being in love, or delighted to be in love, or ready to be in love, or finished with being in love, or looking like they ought to be in love .... I best like the poems that evoke not only some generic feeing, but also introduce the very special and unique person whom it's all about.

    Your poem here is like that ... I feel as if I am meeting you, very slowly, as I read your verse! And your other poems.

    I think the very rich, thickly embroidered metaphors and other tropes of which you make these poems does result in delightful verse (everybody likes to read lovingly composed verse just for its own sake!) but results also in our needing to read it several times in order to find the full emotional impact which is somewhat masked by the cleverness of the text.

    I think some other people might disagree with me ... anyway that's what I can say to comment. It is certainly beautiful and knowledgeably made verse!

    I'm probably telling you about a puzzle that never goes away!
    We can make a single petal into a whole garden, or else cover the scene by throwing baskets full of petals ... and there will always be somebody to say we chose the wrong technique.

    | Posted on 2012-11-12 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]
      I always love your work. So unique, and beautiful delivery :)
    | Posted on 2012-11-03 00:00:00 | by metallichick786 | [ Reply to This ]
       I don't know? I do know this is beautiful. And that I always like visiting your pages.
    | Posted on 2012-11-03 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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