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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: flamedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jeniecel
    ASL Info:    28/f/philippines
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 313/373/169
    Words: 52
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 653
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 378



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsflamedots
    -------------------------------------------



    Your fingertips
    hold the tip of a pen
    scribbling all over my skin
    like a white unused page

    words whirl up
    like hungry waves
    against your masculinity
    feeding my powdered dreams

    Oh you can write me down
    forever, right before
    the first peak of the indifferent
    sun.





    Submitted on 2012-11-05 19:05:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The idea of this is so enticing
    I think it should go both ways
    in other words you should get to
    do some of the writing too


    In this first part you use fingertip and then tip
    I like it better with just the one tip.
    plus this gives The idea of using the
    fingers themselves on the
    Skin more weight


    Your fingers are the tip
    Of a pen
    Scribbling all over my skin
    Filling my unused page

    Words whirl up
    In hungry waves
    Against your masculinity
    Feeding my powdered dreams

    Oh you can write me down
    Forever, right before
    The first peak of the indifferent
    Sun.
    | Posted on 2013-01-22 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]
      You made writing very sexy here. I like how this ends with so much passion. I think you mean -your- on the first line. I enjoyed your poem as always.


    --Tom
    | Posted on 2012-11-05 00:00:00 | by quicksorrow | [ Reply to This ]


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