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    dots Submission Name: Diablodots

    Author: LiveInDreams
    Elite Ratio:    2.47 - 3/6/8
    Words: 80
    Class/Type: Poetry/I hate you
    Total Views: 884
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 538

       This is about a girl I used to be friends with, but then she turned into a monster, a devil.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Is what you are to me
    The red it burns
    In your eyes I can see
    Snakelike tounge
    Poison red lips
    Stinging words
    Killer kiss
    Your hair is like medusa
    Soul sucking cold
    Icy veins
    As cold as snow
    Your heart is black
    All shriveled and dead
    You know of no love
    Unless it's full of dread
    You are full of yourself
    But contain no trust
    We once were friends
    So what happened to us?

    Submitted on 2012-11-19 17:58:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||

    I have certainly experienced friendsí betrayal. It's indeed and piercing a feeling. This actually reminds me of me when I was younger. I used to think that everything was a matter of life or dead.... I don't care much about anything now....

    As for your issue, it seems to me that this so-called friend did something wrong and now you have 2 choices: either give them another chance, which no many people can do it or just forget about them and find new friends.

    As to your write, I have to say that literal venting is not really scintillating. I guess, and this can be arguable since I'm by no means a great writer, people expect to read probably a more metaphoric, between the lines, indirect venting rather than an obvious one, as far as I gather.

    Nice attempt though
    Good luck and keep posting,

    Ethan Brody

    | Posted on 2012-11-28 00:00:00 | by Ethan Brody | [ Reply to This ]

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