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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Silencedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: nwproud
    ASL Info:    27 / vancouver, wa
    Elite Ratio:    5.62 - 280/243/64
    Words: 164
    Class/Type: Prose/Misc
    Total Views: 989
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1069



    Description:
       To keep quiet.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSilencedots
    -------------------------------------------


    A curse for the noise which surrounds us
    bends upon itself in the back of my mouth.
    Ingenuous lovers and rebellious youth
    Articulate the dissention we have come to believe in.
    For all that is spoken, sociable soldiers
    still pity the wordless, blind, and inconsiderate,
    there is little emotion offered, and none accepted.
    We stand our ground, there is pride and courage
    where words have served so little for others.
    If only for the argument we will commit to,
    is there no reason to simply stare, to shrug
    our shoulders in disgust for the logic and reason
    this society looks up to?
    We have already once given up words,
    the answers were ceded by force and ignorance
    when hesitance drew anger and hate.
    Instead, allow the correspondence to remain
    half-finished at our desk,
    there is no purpose behind writing,
    no fascination with the story
    in which life, the lie, is loved
    such that the world has stopped turning.




    Submitted on 2012-11-22 02:19:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Hi Tony,

    I hope you are doing well. This is so intricately enthralling. It's been a long time since I last read something that interested me as much as this. It's awesome. It sounds like the astringent social criticism I've always wanted to write but neither have I been able to do it nor have I the talent to do so. I loved the subtlety you achieved and the word choice. I must say that it feels like a poem which was one of the reason I liked all that much.

    As for the content itself, I would say that the "ingenious lovers" may refers to all those kids that get to be parents at such a early age and the "rebellious youth" could be a way to describe the young gangs, young criminals or young disruptive kids like the one who killed around 25 people in USA a couple of days ago.


    The "social soldier" might be all those people that for good or bad are in the limelight and wish not to exist or to be ignored as other have the allege privilege to.

    With the "little emotion offered, and none accepted" you might be saying that, or what I interpret is that values like the ones we once respected are gone and now it is all about money/business. And I happen to agree with that, if that was actually the message since I'm just speculating.

    As I said, I concur with the former idea because I see it daily. People have no common decency these days, particularly those who held high/important post. They are only interested in production and some have simply lost their human traits, to put it that way. And I seem to believe that your write deals or tends to deals with that subject matter, as far as I gather.

    As to the "words" having "served so little for others" appears to make references to war and with the values "this society looks up to" you again lmake some deprecating remarks against the new repulsive way society functions.

    Finally, I have to say that the ending is simple remarkable. I don't want to sound haughty though it reminds of something I once wrote.

    Well, I that's about it.

    Enjoyed this much,
    Wishing you well,

    Ethan Brody
    | Posted on 2012-12-16 00:00:00 | by Ethan Brody | [ Reply to This ]


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