Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: realities of battledots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: gwenn sundala
    Elite Ratio:    3.71 - 76/70/51
    Words: 385
    Class/Type: Story/Dark
    Total Views: 795
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1956



    Description:
       written from the viewpoint of my oldest fanfiction character.....


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsrealities of battledots
    -------------------------------------------


    it was the worst day of my life.

    we had been delved deep in battle for almost 12 hours, with no end in sight as each enemy we cut down seemed to multiply by a thousand. the king saw our doom foreshadowed, and wished to give his people one last chance of survival. ordering a retreat, i was in position to clear the area as everyone fell back as ordered. i fought hard, cutting down as many enemies as i could, but this last one was tough. knocking me to the ground, i knew in that instant that i was dead. but then he fell down next to me, and i looked up to see my france standing over me, offering his hand. jumping up, i gave him a quick peck on the cheek as a thank you before the next group of attackers came upon us. jumping eagerly to fend them off, i swung my blade with the keen skill of the finest elves. with the soldiers of the king retreated, i turned to my man, yelling that we had to go.
    that was when my heart stopped beating.
    i watched in horror as the scene before me played out in slow motion. turning to run towards me, an enemy we thought had been cut down stood up, raising his blade above his head and bringing it down hard. i screamed, gaining the attention of the king as i rushed to make sure the enemy was cut down this time. my fiancé was on his knees, a stunned look on his face. kneeling next to him, i pulled him into my arms as he stared up at me, his eyes cold and unfeeling. i cried out in anguish, cursing the gods for this fate in my grief. my brother appeared next to me, trying to pull me away. i wanted to die right there, and tried to launch myself at the coming horde in a suicide attack, but my brother would not let me. he dragged me away from the battle as my tirade of grief continued. i was numb, i was cold, i felt nothing but pain, i felt nothing but emptiness.

    surely, a knife pierced my heart that day.

    and i doubted i would ever recover.......




    Submitted on 2013-02-15 01:26:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    196921

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Live In Between written by teika5
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry