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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Needs No Namedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Snow9
    Elite Ratio:    3 - 38/21/17
    Words: 69
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 844
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 468



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsNeeds No Namedots
    -------------------------------------------


    To
    -know the thing rushing through,
    gushing and pouring
    -locate your brother
    in a pin drop light
    -look darkness in the eyes
    -know that I too
    have a heart! & be able
    -say “I’ll be there”
    -feel even the void curved out
    by the impossible past….

    Then choke and fume with irritation
    Or/and drown oneself in music….
    While it,
    I am all that I need to know….




    Submitted on 2013-02-25 07:31:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like the ambiguity of this, it gives a real sense of rushing emotion, a mixture - there's a real immediacy there.

    I also like the effect of 'To' on its own to begin with. That pause kind of sets up a mood, it's like a preparation.


    feel even the void curved out...that's a great line

    Fine poem, yes.
    | Posted on 2013-05-06 00:00:00 | by emwren | [ Reply to This ]


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