Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Mirrordots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jeniecel
    ASL Info:    28/f/philippines
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 313/373/169
    Words: 116
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 503
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 731



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMirrordots
    -------------------------------------------


    You value the golden cord
    encircled to fit a finger
    a woman’s love coverlet
    a rare tale relinquished
    with a tin of roses
    faint and unconscious
    but ignore the seasons I touch
    a blank shelf of time
    I thought my skin will learn again.

    I still think of you
    in the most subtle way a leaf can fall
    on a slightly eroded ground.
    Outside, the fog hangs
    heavy with my overripe flesh casting
    down to gravity.
    I feel the pull of goodbye
    weighing like a cut of paper
    from your absence.

    By every curve of the leg, every trace of my gnarled fingers
    I watch my face
    become yours.




    Submitted on 2013-03-16 02:37:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I felt a push and pull on this one. As a reader I noticed you want to expand yet hold some back. There are some delicate lines here-so sweet and lovely yet you managed to inflict pain in it somehow mixed it up.
    This poem wanted relatedness..catch you and settles in. I felt also a bit sad while reading your works like this one but there's something peaceful to it after reading. Maybe what I want to say is I really like this piece. Just thoughts..
    | Posted on 2013-03-26 00:00:00 | by quicksorrow | [ Reply to This ]
      Where does the importance lie in
    the forming of a relationship?
    Does a man long only for a trophy and
    status without truly knowing the
    innerheart of his mate?
    Is it in the reflection of each individual's mind
    or ego's eye, as it reflects back
    unto itself what it desires? Yet do we
    really see one another?
    What is a woman in the eyes
    of a man? Does she see a reflection of his view?
    Does he see one of hers? Is there to come a point when
    regardless of intent time will merge this union
    into a single reflection? `
    I watch my face become yours may not
    always be the answer but I think if it comes
    because of shared growth and experience as
    partners in life then perhaps it is
    one of the better ones.

    | Posted on 2013-03-16 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    197052

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The World written by jjd
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Carry written by saartha
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Cover written by saartha
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Records I written by Raphael
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Shi written by ShyOne
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Dream written by closetpoet

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry