Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Extended releasedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: OneDarkFlame92
    ASL Info:    23/m/Numeanor
    Elite Ratio:    5.28 - 455/419/222
    Words: 169
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 720
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1080



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsExtended releasedots
    -------------------------------------------


    We talked about it, we really did
    as we stayed up, high,
    letting the absence of sleep dissolve like tiny crystals within the stomachs of the well rested

    we spoke of the challenge of opening up,
    and spilling
    and collecting, stitching,
    healing,
    and moving on.

    And within these walls I am at ease.
    More familiar than my own room.
    But then...then the foreignness grabbed at me and whispered me into comfort--
    a strange comfort.
    Definitely not at ease

    But at least we talked about it and I felt a lot better.
    I also felt well rested.
    A little too well rested as the absence of adventure could not dissolve within the stomachs of the weary.
    Definitely not like tiny crystals, anyways.

    I left.
    Frequently returning to the location;
    never returning to the feeling.
    Until now.
    Now, I'm not all too sure what happened.
    Just that we were high,
    and we talked about it.





    Submitted on 2013-03-19 12:31:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i really love this.
    seriously.

    i love the way you book end the piece with we stayed up and we talked about it.
    the way you create the highness in the piece because you sort of drift and address things but you dont address them so at the end im convinced i was there and i was high and yeah... we talked about it but i cant remember if we got anywhere.

    brilliant!

    i wish i had more feedback but i just cannot get past how much i love this piece.

    great job!
    | Posted on 2013-03-19 00:00:00 | by impossiblyme | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    197068

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    untitled written by Outlaw
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry