Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: entwineddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: irrelevantme
    Elite Ratio:    2.91 - 83/89/62
    Words: 83
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 702
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 618



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsentwineddots
    -------------------------------------------


    In a world
    where a flower buds
    as if watching life,

    I am,

    a withering bloom
    as you blink
    at every promise
    failing and forgotten
    in time
    windswept and moving.

    You are,

    the crescent moon
    in my heartís night sky
    becoming round and full
    glowing with every woken dream.

    We dive

    into a lake of tears;
    a miniscule glimmer
    in the swirls of the milky way
    meeting
    to be loved and lost

    streaming and
    bestirring.




    Submitted on 2013-04-02 07:34:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      We diveinto a lake of tears;
    a miniscule glimmer
    in the swirls of the milky way
    meeting
    (Only)
    To be loved and lost

    Not sure I would even use the last part
    Just end it with lost.
    But seriously
    I love this one just wish i could come up
    With a better
    Review to offer you .
    | Posted on 2013-05-14 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    197153

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Tartarus written by endlessgame23
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Angel Eyes written by poetotoe
    untitled written by ShyOne
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Records I written by Raphael
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    The World written by jjd
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Carry written by saartha
    Cover written by saartha
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Shi written by ShyOne

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry