Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: entwineddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: irrelevantme
    Elite Ratio:    2.91 - 83/89/62
    Words: 83
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 749
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 618



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsentwineddots
    -------------------------------------------


    In a world
    where a flower buds
    as if watching life,

    I am,

    a withering bloom
    as you blink
    at every promise
    failing and forgotten
    in time
    windswept and moving.

    You are,

    the crescent moon
    in my heartís night sky
    becoming round and full
    glowing with every woken dream.

    We dive

    into a lake of tears;
    a miniscule glimmer
    in the swirls of the milky way
    meeting
    to be loved and lost

    streaming and
    bestirring.




    Submitted on 2013-04-02 07:34:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      We diveinto a lake of tears;
    a miniscule glimmer
    in the swirls of the milky way
    meeting
    (Only)
    To be loved and lost

    Not sure I would even use the last part
    Just end it with lost.
    But seriously
    I love this one just wish i could come up
    With a better
    Review to offer you .
    | Posted on 2013-05-14 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    197153

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Linger written by saartha
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    To written by SavedDragon
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Push written by JanePlane
    Incubus written by monad
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    This written by Chelebel
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry