[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Faith in Lovedots

    Author: Iram
    ASL Info:    25/F/from your world
    Elite Ratio:    2.66 - 50/62/55
    Words: 110
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 639
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 820


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFaith in Lovedots

    The golden hearts beat
    Harder than they think
    Frightened from within
    Bleeding and dripping
    Quiet, fretted lub-dub
    Like yours without speech
    That I can still hear, I swear,
    Your capillaries, your tingle,
    Your glowing forehead
    And the raised brows
    Of your startled love
    And the first breath
    You just whispered
    I can hear you tried
    To live.
    I can feel your tremble
    And your striving flight
    Before you dived down
    Scared, scattered, small
    Life-stricken, fallen.
    They speak of my gloom
    Can they speak of my eyes
    And the curse of knowing
    How the golden hearts die
    Holding faith in love
    And stay hidden
    From the world,
    In the dirt.

    Submitted on 2013-06-12 13:59:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      you got me on "lub-dub"
    i am working on the medical field.
    i always enjoy hearing a heart beat.
    i love how this poem is made.
    good job. keep on writing.

    | Posted on 2013-06-25 00:00:00 | by w0ords | [ Reply to This ]
      Very impressive. You took me on a journey with this poem: from the shy beginning of love - life! I dare say; through its soaring and majestic, yet brief flight, and finally as it always has to be - to its descent, perhaps fall? freefall !
    I usually enjoy poems that have rhyme and rythm, but this one took me by surprise - how well you've even it out, it has a flow, and a balance and yet somehow it gives me a beautiful sad feeling. It reminds me of a lullaby.
    Trully one of the few love poems I will undoubtedly revisit.
    | Posted on 2013-06-14 00:00:00 | by Akiko Hime | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    You do, I Do written by poetotoe
    Happy Saint Patrick's Day written by poetotoe
    Dashboard Light written by layDsayD
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    True Death written by layDsayD
    Every..... written by jackz
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    Push written by JanePlane
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    What happens written by Wolfwatching




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]