[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Smiledots

    Author: DarkGunslinger
    Elite Ratio:    2.43 - 7/25/23
    Words: 177
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 636
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1145

       meh. spur of the moment thing. it pretty much sucks.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    In dreams of spreading darkness
    you look up to the sky
    to see your world surrounded
    and fractured by ancient lies

    Angel wings that bend and
    break against the wind
    it's over, old and pointless
    wake up and cry in the darkness


    So drink to the dead
    share your secrets for awhile
    and when the dawn finally breaks
    you can put on your plastic smile

    A bookshelf full of memories
    and priceless tiny denials
    the pages of your books are blank
    the ink has run out of the vials

    All you see is gilded coal
    A burning tomb to a rushing foal
    the trees that speak will try to guide you
    into the memories that will blind you

    So drink to the dead
    share your secrets for awhile
    and when the dawn finally hits
    you can put on your broken smile

    One day you'll find salvation
    from this muddy, desolate mire
    and when you pull yourself out alive
    then you can finally wear a smile

    Submitted on 2013-06-12 15:10:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I must disagree with your description of it sucks. It is written in a much different voice than most of your writing but it is amazing. It has a beautiful flow to it. I would write a better comment but I have now read it about 6 times and am still just lost in it. I'm not sure why I didn't see this piece when it was posted 3 years ago. Great work, keep writing.
    | Posted on 2016-07-25 00:00:00 | by S.A.M. | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    You do, I Do written by poetotoe
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    written by Daniel Barlow
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Whiteout written by layDsayD
    Linger written by saartha
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Every..... written by jackz
    True Death written by layDsayD
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Happy Saint Patrick's Day written by poetotoe
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Push written by JanePlane
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]