Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Cumbered Changedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: KeeperOfLight
    ASL Info:    23, Vancouver BC
    Elite Ratio:    2.55 - 41/64/76
    Words: 156
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 841
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1223



    Description:
       revised


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCumbered Changedots
    -------------------------------------------


    The moment lead her astray

    dragons wings
    unfold
    and a smiling darkness
    looks up
    to the clouded sky

    raging past the striking wind
    hearing her own thunder clap

    walls of reflections
    show her hesitations
    they start revolving
    into dissimulation

    she’s denied
    the semblance of imagination

    she tried to
    smooth back the unfit pieces

    that grants her to see the stars
    that are hidden in the day

    only to find
    turn pipe dreams
    are readily seen

    so she wonder which way?

    yellow cross roads turn gold
    as they whisper

    "Every path is opportunity"

    the trees sway left
    the sun shines right
    the earth shudders

    her feeling guts
    she reaches inside
    and finds her light
    her stars spill out

    recanting another
    dreamers dream

    these pleasing values
    hold no power
    fearless words
    cumber her with change

    she’s all confused
    is this happening to you?




    Submitted on 2013-07-22 18:37:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Yes, I used my warlock box key and discovered that it incurred indenture and indemnity when I was hoping for release and escape. At least I still have what Pandora left me.

    Bruce
    | Posted on 2013-07-22 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    197660

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Where is My Ghost written by ForgottenGraves
    This written by Chelebel
    Broken Promises written by S.A.M.
    Bam (Awash). written by Daniel Barlow
    Some of it written by Daniel Barlow
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    Stance written by Daniel Barlow
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    Legends written by poetotoe
    ... written by Daniel Barlow
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    ME written by jjd
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    "other people don't get that" written by Daniel Barlow
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry