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    dots Submission Name: Missing the Rainy Daysdots

    Author: Kael Fenshir
    ASL Info:    26 / M / That weird place
    Elite Ratio:    2.18 - 17/57/52
    Words: 76
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 464
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 502


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMissing the Rainy Daysdots

    As the record spins
    Music fills my outer pores
    I try to relax
    And I try to remain straight
    Even though my whole entire being is stained
    With fantasies and shit covered dreams
    Self indulgence only shows my true intentions
    The record keeps on spinning
    I'm lost and your found
    You're always found by everyone else
    It only hurts even more
    When I come to the full realization
    That every single thing was my fault

    Submitted on 2013-07-31 20:50:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      "I`m lost and your found" should be "I`m lost and you`re found". It`s a tiny detail, but I`ve been corrected so much here that I know small details can sometimes derail people and distract them so that they focus on the errors instead of your overall piece.

    But I really liked how you kept the spinning record as your red thread throughout the piece, it kept it together, and you have some really interesting images here! The piece is honest, raw and conveys the emotion really well. Good job, and keep writing. It heals broken hearts like nothing else, except perhaps music.
    | Posted on 2013-08-06 00:00:00 | by ChrystalR | [ Reply to This ]
      i love this....i totally relate...i like the language you used...the way you wrote reminds me of myself a lot. great read i'll check out more
    | Posted on 2013-08-03 00:00:00 | by Rhaine | [ Reply to This ]

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