Morality demands we keep a platonic distance
But you damn morality even as you preach it
And I am weak.
How much have you told him, I wonder?
Does he know that we lay in your bed
Until 2:30 AM
Talking while I hold you?
Does he know that sometimes
You cry in your sleep?
If he's so good
Did you need me in the first place?
Can't I say no?
This only ends in pain, for me.
I see you, and I melt
I leave you, and steel myself
(A misguided effort at saving my own skin)
Only to melt again with one of your goddamn
The best part is
When the shit hits the fan
And oh boy, will it.
All you've done, to all of us
Somehow, that's my fault too.
If you wanted to help me
Stop hating myself
Making me question my own morals
Probably wasnt the best way to go about it.
Now I'm damned in everyone's eyes
And none more than my own.
Even now, knowing that
Still I lay and talk and hold you
Let you cry into my shoulder
And stare at the ceiling, pretending
That this is forever
That it's not going to hurt
That it's not slowly eating me alive.
Damn you for making me love you.