Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Sorrydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Teofila
    ASL Info:    17, F, with the wolves
    Elite Ratio:    0.48 - 210/102/70
    Words: 98
    Class/Type: Poetry/Sorry
    Total Views: 1248
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 712



    Description:
       *sigh*


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSorrydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Oh sweetheart
    Please understand
    I wouldn't say
    I'm sorry
    If I didn't mean it.
    I wouldn't waste my breath
    My time
    My life
    Trying to apologize.
    Not to you.
    Not to anyone.
    Why go through the pain
    When I can save myself the strife?
    I'll watch the time go by
    See how things go.
    Maybe if they go well
    I'll let you know.
    From now on
    My sweet fa├žade is gone.
    From now on
    You will get nothing
    Nothing but the brutal truth.
    I'm sorry.
    I'll say it now
    Before I hurt you
    Anymore than
    I already have...




    Submitted on 2013-10-30 20:39:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think I've been on the receiving end of a piece like this. It's definitely a bit frustrating to have to take it to that level of honesty.

    This piece was a very easy read for me with very deep rooted emotions. I like how easily it flows. My favorite lines are the "why go through the pain/ when I can save myself the strife" lines.

    At least this gives some fore-warning about the honesty, I didn't have such. It just started happening and was confusing. Whom ever this is intended for (if anyone) oughta feel lucky for the warming, not many get that.

    But anyways, good write. The number of commas seemed distracting, but it's not big enough to incite a drastic change. These are great! Keep it up.
    | Posted on 2013-11-10 00:00:00 | by Zai | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    198122

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Genesis written by saartha
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stretto written by saartha
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Faith In Line written by MyPeriodical
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Born of the Mouth written by MyPeriodical
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Sunt Mala Quae Libas written by MyPeriodical
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry