[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Sorrydots

    Author: Teofila
    ASL Info:    17, F, with the wolves
    Elite Ratio:    0.48 - 210/102/70
    Words: 98
    Class/Type: Poetry/Sorry
    Total Views: 1054
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 712


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Oh sweetheart
    Please understand
    I wouldn't say
    I'm sorry
    If I didn't mean it.
    I wouldn't waste my breath
    My time
    My life
    Trying to apologize.
    Not to you.
    Not to anyone.
    Why go through the pain
    When I can save myself the strife?
    I'll watch the time go by
    See how things go.
    Maybe if they go well
    I'll let you know.
    From now on
    My sweet fa├žade is gone.
    From now on
    You will get nothing
    Nothing but the brutal truth.
    I'm sorry.
    I'll say it now
    Before I hurt you
    Anymore than
    I already have...

    Submitted on 2013-10-30 20:39:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I think I've been on the receiving end of a piece like this. It's definitely a bit frustrating to have to take it to that level of honesty.

    This piece was a very easy read for me with very deep rooted emotions. I like how easily it flows. My favorite lines are the "why go through the pain/ when I can save myself the strife" lines.

    At least this gives some fore-warning about the honesty, I didn't have such. It just started happening and was confusing. Whom ever this is intended for (if anyone) oughta feel lucky for the warming, not many get that.

    But anyways, good write. The number of commas seemed distracting, but it's not big enough to incite a drastic change. These are great! Keep it up.
    | Posted on 2013-11-10 00:00:00 | by Zai | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Wavelength written by saartha
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Dashboard Light written by layDsayD
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    written by Daniel Barlow
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Bond written by saartha
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Linger written by saartha
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Estranged / Shocks written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]