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    dots Submission Name: Leaning Towerdots

    Author: Zai
    ASL Info:    24/m/US
    Elite Ratio:    3.97 - 66/145/98
    Words: 133
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 501
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 794

       Let me know what you think of when you read this. What double meanings you get and if it really even works out. It's either awesome or possum.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLeaning Towerdots

    From the fire beneath, I dont perspire.
    I aspire up a spire,
    among a dire need to ascend higher and lighter,
    the flames brighter and tighter.
    My lyre plays in the background.
    The liar sings the pillar pyre fire,
    his pair of lungs in prayer force air to expire.
    I have aspired to a height greatly admired.
    The lyre in tune is a pirate for hire,
    who plays for the lightning to strike down the liar.
    Crack! on the spire, down below laughs the liar.
    I am so very tired, even my grip is on fire,
    the lyre plays higher and the clouds begin to perspire.
    Down my face, cool my hand, clean the air,
    Douse the fire.
    The liar's pyre is my spire.
    I picked you lyre,
    how peculiar.

    Submitted on 2013-11-30 04:10:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||

    It might not be possum. The wordplay is a bit much. I feel like it loses meaning in order to keep up the cleverness, which is never a trade I would make. But it might be amusing nonetheless if you could keep the meter consistent. As is it stumbles up and down the stairs just a bit too much.
    | Posted on 2013-11-30 00:00:00 | by lukewarm | [ Reply to This ]
      Ok probably really off but I thought about a humans fight for Heaven while being gripped and drug down into Hell by the world...I don't know...Im just really weird sorry
    | Posted on 2013-11-30 00:00:00 | by Teofila | [ Reply to This ]

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