Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Can You Save Me Nowdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: TeslaKoyal
    Elite Ratio:    1.81 - 19/65/84
    Words: 315
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 337
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1863



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCan You Save Me Nowdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I watch my cold black sky fly over me
    I close my eyes your face is all I see
    The wind blows softly as I fall asleep
    In my dreams the monsters, they creep
    The shadows of my world are haunting me
    Will I ever be set free
    I feel so rejected
    my mind is infected
    From my dreams and what is real
    My demon, my heart you did steal
    I cant believe in myself anymore
    My heart stops as I fall to the floor

    Can you save me now
    Am I in too deep
    The stars are falling down
    While I forever dream

    Another day starts to go by
    The tears come slowly as I start to cry
    Thinking thoughts not wanting to
    My demon, what can I do
    Trying to stay strong for us
    And staying true to you I must
    Can you help me find my way
    Each and every day
    What is my life all about
    Will I ever make it out
    I’m lost I'm broken
    I’m lost I'm broken

    Can you save me now
    Am I in too deep
    The stars are falling down
    While I forever dream
    Can you save me now
    Am I still asleep
    My sky is falling down
    While I forever dream

    For all the hate that’s been unfurled
    I’m falling into my own world
    I need you right now
    I shall reach you but how
    I just want to run away
    From these terror filled days
    I can't even find one reason
    Why I should live without you demon
    I am lost no longer found
    In my tears I will soon drown

    Can you save me now
    Am I in too deep
    The stars are falling down
    While I forever dream
    Can you save me now
    Am I still asleep
    My sky is falling down
    While I forever dream




    Submitted on 2013-12-15 00:01:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      
    1. i really like this and i can relate
    2. i dont have anything i can say i dont like about this one
    3. i can relate and connect to this
    4. havent we all been burned by love , yet we write such fleeting feelings
    5. the whole thing in genral kept me intrigued
    6. feels more like a song then a poem or writing
    7. nope pretty clear on the heartbreak :(
    8. own personal heart acke
    9. i dont want you to change it ,
    10. havent .
    11. very heartfelt
    12. yes

    rate from me 5/5

    *** comment back
    | Posted on 2013-12-18 00:00:00 | by kyserin | [ Reply to This ]
      I really loved this... and I can relate all too well. Trust me. It can and will get better- if anyone understands despair and helplessness I am all too familiar. Take care if you ever need to talk let me know :)
    | Posted on 2013-12-16 00:00:00 | by metallichick786 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    198426

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry