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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: like a hollowdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jeniecel
    ASL Info:    28/f/philippines
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 313/373/169
    Words: 127
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 884
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 736



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotslike a hollowdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Our distance, is not for the world to make
    nor for time to sustain, it is this: that we loved,
    reluctantly, not allowing to spring what is purest of sorrow, nor confess as it is;
    not even night itself can hold the darkness where you lingers, and cars pass me by as if it carries your wishes- the way your eyes unravel my weakness and set in one morning when you slowly slip into ambiguity.

    I feel you like a hollow in a row of trees, like a coward and love is the beast,
    love is
    It is not continuance that free ourselves,
    nor living.
    For as the bird learns to depart from the tree, farther away, earned its wings.





    Submitted on 2013-12-17 09:28:51     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I read these words and I wonder at the slim
    Hand that penned such thoughts to page.
    Grand yet humble ideas that come from the heart and speak to
    My heart. Speak in a manner that woos me to tears
    Quiets my fears and gives me new faith to continue
    The journey of years.
    | Posted on 2013-12-27 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this it had an imagery to it .. I do agree with kyserin.. I found a few parts confusing.. can't tell if the formats off or it just needs proofreading example:

    "hold the darkness where you lingers"
    should that be linger or is it a play on words i'm missing? anyway liked it good work look forward to reading more by you.
    | Posted on 2013-12-20 00:00:00 | by layDsayD | [ Reply to This ]
      wow usualy i just rate from the 1-12 , but you know what im gonna go custom on this comment,

    i really like this writing , it was heartfelt
    wordy ,witty ,meaningful

    some words you could have changed if
    & when you proof read , sometimes the word
    play will change from what is forming in your head

    i give this a 5/5

    * no one should have to deal with feeling like this
    but it happens. *hugs*
    | Posted on 2013-12-18 00:00:00 | by kyserin | [ Reply to This ]


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