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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: untitleddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Passionbyapathy
    ASL Info:    23/M/Columbus, Ohio
    Elite Ratio:    5.3 - 207/276/228
    Words: 75
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 606
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 642



    Description:
       I plan to hone this more. Just ignore it as another piece of my seemingly endless melancholy.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsuntitleddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Our souls met in this chest
    so many times it throbs
    along with this absence
    I've barely stifled
    these sobs
    Her shadow lingers
    passing
    the night grows long
    every moment waxing
    moons
    and dying fire
    A toll embellished
    taxing
    until quiet
    I restlessly
    shift covers
    and grieve
    alone

    This tone is heavy
    with burden
    turned inwards
    vicious
    cursing at reflection
    damned by recollection
    daunted by perspective
    honed by harassment
    this world condoned




    Submitted on 2014-01-30 01:11:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You misspelled dying.
    | Posted on 2014-02-03 00:00:00 | by 777sacrites777 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    2. Try not to give only compliments.
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    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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