[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: on this river i borrowdots

    Author: isabella
    Elite Ratio:    5.56 - 803/905/472
    Words: 113
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1693
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 724

       something old.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotson this river i borrowdots

    on this river i was baptized in,
    in the upstate mud flowing south,
    i am brown as earth.
    scorched with realization.
    molded and shaped to be.
    in this minute. in this second.
    in this something with no name.
    no shame.
    tears and strawberries seed a subtle wind;
    become the juice
    in this hand-hold of being.
    this soul of me, this heart of me,
    intertwines with all that is beautiful.
    all that is ugly.
    all that is blackwhitecoloredred
    pouring into

    awaiting remembrance

    and the time before fruit.

    Submitted on 2014-06-11 07:11:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||

    I've heard some poetry spoken aloud recently. And what strikes me is that even some of my favorite published famous-ass poets still read like grad school students.

    So don't dare read this like that. Because this poem begs to be read with passion. It gathers up this raw earth, shapes it into clay, pours sweet messy fruit into it and through some kind of powerful fermentation pours forth blood-red wine and then, surprise, it uses all of this only to highlight that which lays underneath, that nameless thing you were aware of only in contrast, something far more interesting than simply frolicking in the mess of life and calling it meaning, a pale white ghost of a memory that knows nothing of mess and everything of being and being whole, of being before being, of waiting to be connected or reconnected and GOD have we not all been here before and perhaps mistakenly maybe called upon some name of the thing which this is most certainly is not and definitely is more than.

    So yeah I like it. It's cool. Thanks for sharing.
    | Posted on 2014-06-16 00:00:00 | by lukewarm | [ Reply to This ]
      and the time before fruit.

    most powerful line ever.
    back to the garden of eden... before everything was wrong in the world... before everything was broken...

    gah. i love how you give words life.

    this whole piece is beautiful.

    one day i want to visit this river you write of. it seems so life giving, so inspiring, so forgiving and cleansing and healing..

    this really is a beautiful piece and this comment has done it no justice whatsoever...
    | Posted on 2014-06-14 00:00:00 | by allapo1ogies | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]