[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Beef Mignon and Jusdots

    Author: Narna
    Elite Ratio:    1.74 - 14/102/69
    Words: 260
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1032
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1696


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBeef Mignon and Jusdots

    The clatter of cutlery challenges the chatter of good company,
    mingling, this is a typical evening.
    As the collision ensues,
    continues to surround me, I'm impugned.
    I am unable to match the intensity
    or the density of my fellow diners;

    -Old timers who use no words to pass sentiments,
    he doesn't like broccoli, she does,
    he wants more sauce, she has to much
    and they share,
    the quiet of each other in the calamity
    of this eatery.
    -Henry has been spending way too much time with Jane,
    and not enough time with
    'doesn't chew her food before she talks',
    Mary agrees yet takes time to swallow before she speaks,
    "treat him mean keep him keen, he'll see you're way better than she is".
    you should not have swallowed.
    Advice like that is better off muffled and spat.
    -Business partners are made over one, two, three bottles..
    important decisions take time, and there's truth in wine.
    I'm not sure how much progress they'll make,
    with Tonys head buried In half eaten steak,
    with Gregs hand reaching out for the waitresses hips,
    as he begs for the attention Mrs. Greg never gives,
    and the other one,
    pausing to guffaw between gulps of Pinot noir,
    wont last long.
    Sure they'll have stories, but nothing to write the clients about.

    As my meal arrives;
    I wonder if this is what the waiters think,
    when all the food's bussed out.

    Submitted on 2014-07-03 15:23:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Nice read. Superfluous but vivid, lyrical. So you doubt the levity.
    | Posted on 2014-07-31 00:00:00 | by Snow9 | [ Reply to This ]
      i hardly doubt the waiters have the time to think all that. i love the narrative you did for this. it jumps from person to person and opens up the eating out dynamic. like most things it turns into a social game. i like to keep them fun but i'm the jester type in my real life. foolish enough to be a fool with little to no regret. i never liked the whole eat your neighbor dynamic which presents itself in these social games. everyone stepping on someone else to get what they want when if we figured what another wants we'd all get it and not have sore feet. i guess it's difficult to sway a crowd. and if it's a business lunch well politics is hard to get away from. intriguing writing well worth the time to read. tastes like good prose.
    | Posted on 2014-07-03 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]