[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: not even a black holedots

    Author: AsiaticFox
    ASL Info:    28/M/A butterfly's dream
    Elite Ratio:    4.8 - 254/389/301
    Words: 64
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 714
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 434

       Starting poems with a random word and then seeing where I go from there...generally leads to the same place, the same thoughts, just expressed in a slightly different way. Still, a fun exercise.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsnot even a black holedots

    Ossified, the memories of the past,
    unyielding and unmerciful,
    forever called to mind
    like songs on the Billboard Top 100;
    they play again and again
    and keep on well past the point of sickness.

    Alleviated, the day of unending sunshine
    has come, to chase away all shadows
    and illuminate all my bones and sinew;
    not even a black hole could swallow
    the light.

    Submitted on 2014-07-17 10:49:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Like a turn on a swing set, we start down, then max out on the pullout g's and soar upwards. Nice ride. I think it worthy of more consideration as to title and tend to want to add an "and" before your "not even..."

    I appreciate your explanation of how you started with a random word. Such tips are muses in themselves.
    | Posted on 2014-07-21 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      Strained as it might futurity fatidic's seem the blond in my entropy catalyst to me. To my omnipresent omniscience the thought of such clairaudience clairvoyance, omnificent omnipotence. Now you might say that this is purely nouminal thinking not grounded in corporeally preternatural finite fact but I would say what the evolutional precept is imagination's immaturity for if not to illuminate.

    | Posted on 2014-07-19 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]
      i generally do that. it's all just language sets to form analogies. this is refreshingly uplifting.
    | Posted on 2014-07-18 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a beautiful write. Particularly the last two lines. Brilliant, that.

    Yes.. I do believe that not even a black hole could swallow the light. Of that I am sure.

    You are refreshing kind sir.

    Thanks for sharing this.
    | Posted on 2014-07-18 00:00:00 | by isabella | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Giving written by jjd
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Bond written by saartha
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Incubus written by monad
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Push written by JanePlane
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Linger written by saartha
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Song written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]