[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Never want to lose youdots

    Author: childoftears
    ASL Info:    20/female/CV Arkansas
    Elite Ratio:    1.02 - 3/24/39
    Words: 151
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 1164
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 912

       About a friend i whole dear and near to my heart but its very much more then that like spirit soul mates or something. :)

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsNever want to lose youdots

    Into his eyes I stare
    To afraid to speak my true feelings,I wouldnt dare
    His soul such beauty I seek within
    But to ruin our friendship would b a sin.

    To lose him would drive me insane
    Like shoving a knife straight through the heart,the unbearable
    Hes my best friend,hes like my guardian
    Hes sweet,so lovable this amazing being not like the rest of

    Hes shown me a new way of living
    But so hard when I look at him,Im mesmerized like that
    annoying song you cant avoid with that up beat kind of

    Cant describe how I feel when were together
    Its like the whole world around us disappears
    Hes the only one who truly understands me
    the only one that listens the only on that hears.

    But my feelings I must hide
    to keep him by my side.

    Submitted on 2014-11-10 16:57:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
    A familiar story that all of us know all too well. I think if you structured this a little better and reworded some lines to keep syllables closer together youd have am amazing piece. Almost reads like most of the ones I write. Keep it up
    | Posted on 2014-11-13 00:00:00 | by kase | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stretto written by saartha
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    Genesis written by saartha
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Incubus written by monad
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Faith In Line written by MyPeriodical
    ME written by jjd
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]