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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: self critique [final, maybe]dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: EshyFishy
    ASL Info:    21yo mess having crises
    Elite Ratio:    6.92 - 126/123/57
    Words: 135
    Class/Type: Cheesy Joke/Childrens
    Total Views: 778
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 758



    Description:
       I wrote this on my fkn iPod and I have auto capitalise disabled. some writer. pick this apart, I honestly don't care anymore! ES has a totally different crowd than when I started so. knock yourselves out, babes.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsself critique [final, maybe]dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I can't write anymore.

    words don't fall off the ends of my fingertips like they used to. I have no rhythm, and I have no flow.

    my sentences don't vary. they are short and stocky. staccato. small details. I forget how to use literary devices.

    that or my paragraphs are made of sentences which are, in themselves, a novel. I think to myself that using proper English and proper grammar is so classist, and ableist, and I want no part in that. but at the same time, I want to create art, and people don't appreciate mistakes in a masterpiece.

    I look at pieces I wrote. I was 9 when I first started. and here I am. ten years later, no drive. I was 16 when I stopped. good riddance.




    Submitted on 2014-12-17 09:36:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I can't write anymore.

    words don't fall off the ends of my fingertips like they used to. I have no rhythm, and I have no flow.


    ...and my syllables have nowhere to go
    they lead such tepid lives
    withpunctuated wives
    leisurely and slow

    they crawl inside themselves
    and hide on the highest shelves
    behind organic soups
    on an endless loop
    of unfinished works
    without a single spark
    retirees in the dark

    I think I will join them soon
    a million years from here
    when the dark and the dust have cleared
    from the triangular tip of the moon
    | Posted on 2014-12-19 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
      You should keep writing. This sounds like someone who wants to be a writer more than someone who has something on their mind. You sound more interested in your "ability" or "style" which seems to be slipping away from you. This kind of pre-occupation is not very helpful, you would be better off thinking about content. If you have something on your mind, or you see something that interests you, why not try to write a poem about it? If you don't, then just leave it. There's no need to beat yourself up saying your quitting or anything like that. There's no point writing for the sake of it. But I read your Lips poem and I thought it was pretty good. It would be a waste for you to stop, if you keep writing you'll probably surprise yourself.

    It's not a crisis if your not in the humour of writing anything, actually it's much worse if you have something you really want to write about but have no idea how to do it. Good luck anyway.
    | Posted on 2014-12-18 00:00:00 | by Wolfwatching | [ Reply to This ]
      The best tools are the ones you can put discretely into your pocket, then whip out and put immediately to use whenever the occasion arises. When you carry it around in your pocket, you become surprised at how handy it is having it there.
    | Posted on 2014-12-17 00:00:00 | by Ontlogicalamity | [ Reply to This ]
      I feel for you. The urge to write, to create something artistic and aesthetic can be a rewarding thing. I guess if you don't enjoy it or can't really climb out to it anymore it might seem somewhat futile or limpid. For the longest time I sort of ran out of stuff to write about but I got my second wind and I'm happy I did. Writing can be such sweet solace.

    Bruce
    | Posted on 2014-12-17 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]


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