Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Night Commutedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Vismare
    Elite Ratio:    4.84 - 19/16/9
    Words: 121
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 592
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 842



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsNight Commutedots
    -------------------------------------------


    It's 3 am, late at night
    Early morning if you prefer
    Driving, running all red lights
    Speeding, empty, all a blur.

    It's wet outside and it has rained
    Constellations comprised of watered light
    My windshield speckled, watered, stained
    A blurry world, but starry sight.

    Shadowed objects in the street
    Show themselves in silhouette
    First glace I took, and in my seat
    Creatures, beings, strongly set.

    Faded streams of objects passing
    Reflected lines, undemensioned
    Limit of speed, I seem surpassing
    A world of unknown, unintentioned.

    Finally home, but not forgotten
    The world I saw at such a time
    And even though I was begotten
    I'll always view it as a sublime.




    Submitted on 2015-01-02 15:20:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think that to work within the restraints of a rhyme scheme or meter is an adequate task. I think that if any poet wants to become better or more equipped to attempt all types of writings then this pursuit is an excellent course along which to set oneself.

    My windshield speckled, watered, stained
    A blurry world, but starry sight.

    Like I think that there is kind of lovely
    and deep and rich with insight.

    I wish you well in your travels with this.

    Daniel :)
    | Posted on 2015-01-03 00:00:00 | by Daniel Barlow | [ Reply to This ]
      thoughts sullen yet sober in the rearview
    brought about resolve, and dissolve into a clear view.
    the bitter taste of bark, had it's side effects,
    and though i dream a we as one, it's yet to happen yet.

    musings on your verse. well written. seemingly clear in process.
    | Posted on 2015-01-03 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    199794

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Genesis written by saartha
    Legends written by poetotoe
    All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stretto written by saartha
    untitled written by Chelebel
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    This written by Chelebel
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore
    By the bar written by expiring_touch

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry