Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Maybe, Okay, I Don't, Caredots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: TeslaKoyal
    Elite Ratio:    1.81 - 19/66/84
    Words: 140
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 556
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1365



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMaybe, Okay, I Don't, Caredots
    -------------------------------------------


    Disappearing
    Apprehensive
    Paranoia
    Defensive
    Lying here
    Crying there

    Inspection
    Depression
    Misleading
    Intention
    Lying here
    Crying here

    No
    I said no
    Maybe
    Okay
    I don't care
    Means nothing

    Fine
    I said I'm fine
    Go away
    Get out
    Leave me alone
    Means nothing

    Don't
    Stop it
    Please
    No don't
    Please don't!
    Stop!!
    Means nothing

    Again?
    No
    C'mon...
    No
    Now!
    No
    !@#$%^&
    Stop!!

    Means nothing
    Means nothing
    Means nothing

    4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13...
    Enough?
    No
    More?
    No
    Maybe
    Okay
    I don't care

    23
    Still screaming
    Inside
    Outside
    Stop?
    No
    Maybe
    Okay
    I don't care

    Used
    Enough?
    No
    More?
    No
    Now!
    NO!
    Stop
    Please just stop

    Give up
    Give in
    Just do it
    Just do it
    Just give up
    Just give in
    No
    Maybe
    Okay
    I don't care




    Submitted on 2015-02-06 12:21:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      you sound so tired
    thank you for the read
    I'm not the brightest bulb in the box
    so my critique would not help you

    reading this I see nothing I'd change
    | Posted on 2015-02-12 00:00:00 | by deluka | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    199950

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    The World written by jjd
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry