Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Cant Enchantdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Blue Monk
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 1546/457/118
    Words: 51
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 546
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 329



    Description:
       Who knows?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCant Enchantdots
    -------------------------------------------


    By void avoid each shifting phase
    through never ending purple maze
    of months and days each second plays

    beyond the witch's gaze

    into the pot we've long forgot
    where ripples grow if not for rot
    a pointed nose of power grows

    or so we must suppose




    Submitted on 2015-02-23 13:54:31     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I've read this several times now. The eternal rhyme makes me want you to continue. It was like a peek at a rap song not quite complete.
    Not sure if this has any connection to your journal, but the passing through the purple maze and second guesses, well they just fit.

    I like this as an abstract piece that leaves the reader to interpret against their experiences, because we all wade through the gooey maze and second guess things. it's also true that we let i go or it grows in power when given attention (at least in our minds).
    | Posted on 2015-03-10 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the internal rhymes; void avoid and not for rot, especially.
    Of course, I also like the purple maze.

    As for the nose...
    I saw it differently than Bruce.
    Rather than a nosy Parker, I thought of a tyrranical Pinnochio...
    I guess perspective is a rather odd filter.

    I enjoyed this snappy little ditty. Im happy to see the muse still visits you.

    | Posted on 2015-03-01 00:00:00 | by latentlylyrical | [ Reply to This ]
      I will not be voyeurized into submission. nosy fu(kers.
    | Posted on 2015-02-23 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    199996

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry