[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Lovestone Tombdots

    Author: ShadowParadox
    Elite Ratio:    2.65 - 23/66/34
    Words: 359
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 577
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2450


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLovestone Tombdots

    I close my eyes

    As my dreams writes lullabies into my heart
    My thoughts become fairy tales
    As I lean into the spine of Love

    I don’t understand you
    Whisper I
    My words blooming into a flower
    against Love’s lips

    She smiles bleeding herself inside the flower
    Folding herself into the crevices of my heart
    She sings the lullabies that were written on my heart

    Then moves through me searching
    Searching for my inner pain

    She finds it
    Lingering on the edge of my soul


    My inner fear

    She buries herself inside my ache
    I try to unhook her but she’s embedded deep in me
    I scream frustrated

    I’m too late

    My metamorphosis has already begun
    I cry
    My tears blueish ink
    Dripping on my paper folded wings

    Your monster is beautiful
    Love’s words burns through me
    I’m twisted into myself drowning
    In the galaxy of this phobia

    I unsheathe my claws into the ground

    I will carve forbidden dreams into the root of this world
    Carving curves of butterflies
    Torn from imaginations dimensions
    I will lace their bodies into Moon’s patterns
    Drowning their porcelain wings
    Inside the temple of silhouettes

    I then sprinkle these vows onto my belly
    But are these empty promises?

    The butterflies become ashes
    Evaporating into the fog of my mind
    I am broken inside of Him
    As Love laughs and swallows my emotions
    Leaving me with hers

    I tried to create my own fantasy
    It crashed and burned down a long time ago
    Now I’m forced to swim in this ocean
    Of the one I may love

    I have blossomed into a romance sarcophagus
    Dripping with angst
    I have become the ink inside my lover’s eyes
    He gazes at me and smiles

    But I’m not lost in his maze yet
    My wings are stretched and open yet I can’t fly

    I’ve become a dream stitched to Lover’s bones
    I will only be released
    When he awakens
    From his sleeping beauty slumber

    Until then I’m stuck
    Inside this lovestone tomb
    Within his heart

    Submitted on 2015-03-02 02:51:28     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      L2 As my dreams write lullabies ……not writes lullabies. L6 'Whispered I' could be better, I guess "whisper I" could work if you want present tense but 'I whisper' is more proper. As I said of your colorfulness you can get away with some improperness if you wish. L27 'Love's words burn'… not "Love's words burns", though it could be 'Love's word burns'.
    | Posted on 2015-04-15 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    The World written by jjd
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    prison written by ShyOne
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]