Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Twisted Fairytales{2}Gold Epileptic Wingsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: ShadowParadox
    Elite Ratio:    2.65 - 23/66/34
    Words: 550
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 590
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 4310



    Description:
       Another prose with a unique style, Diamond Dove suffers with Dementia, Anorexia, and Epilepsy. Reason why the italic paragraphs repeats strangely with fewer or more similarities.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTwisted Fairytales{2}Gold Epileptic Wingsdots
    -------------------------------------------





    Fighting The Sickness Within





    She fluttered her wings against the glass wind

    Her silver eyes catching a glint of the oceanic sky

    As her mind bumped the pane of clouds

    .

    Her thoughts broke through her membrane

    And fell through her blushing plump lips

    She gathered her fallen feathers and

    Wept regrets into her hospital sheets

    Her world dangled on the edge of a tilted syntax

    She was emotionally emotionless in her fractal reasoning

    .

    The parallax of her being were shattered in yesterday’s chaos

    Each day she lost even more feathers

    Every night she grew faint and weak

    Her master was her sickness now

    .

    The lightning and thunder flashed and roared through her rainbow veins

    And tangles of sensitive nerves

    Her shoulder blades would take control of themselves

    Jerking and twisting

    As if dancing to musical chords of nonsense

    .

    The storm raged thru her blood

    It bubbled and bubbled

    Until her stomach clenched as nausea’s wave

    Swept away the good cells

    Cleaning the pearl white shell like bones

    Kissing the volcanic walls of the chest

    .

    Shoving its iron fist into the throat

    Tearing apart the prison bars of tongue, teeth, and lips

    Spilling its crimson remains onto soft delicate hands

    Fevers took charge of the skin changing its temperature to a deserts climate

    The shivers made the threadbare wings flap uncontrollably



    -

    She fluttered her wings against the glass wind

    Her silver eyes catching a glint of the oceanic sky

    As her mind bumped the pane of clouds

    .

    Stuck in her room of doubts

    An Angel who became a unAngel

    Because of the ink curse

    She was made this way little Diamond Dove

    Trapped in her illness inside a notebook

    Plastered on a white page

    Her story

    Told from the tip of a pen

    .

    But she still is beautiful

    She still checks out her almost featherless wings

    Those gorgeous, bright, shining wings

    The ones she took time to pluck despite her pain

    She loved her skin more than those itchy feathers

    @@But she loved her wings

    Her skeletal wings

    Her cobweb fragile wings@@

    .

    Her Golden Epileptic Wings

    -

    She flutters her gold wings against the glass wind

    Her silver eyes catching a glint of the oceanic sky

    Her smile stitched to her face

    As she revolve around her pane of regrets

    .

    Dancing her dangerous moves with Epilepsy

    One last violent shake and the last feather drops

    Her wings more golden then the sun

    More flawless and smooth then the top of the ocean

    She sighs a weak happy sigh

    .

    Caged in her illness

    Lost in her mind

    Riding the seesaw of Life and Death




    Submitted on 2015-03-03 05:13:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      
    | Posted on 2015-05-17 00:00:00 | by DaleP | [ Reply to This ]
      L10 the parallax of her being was shattered ……not were shattered. L28 Desert's climate i think wants to be possessive with the apostrophe not deserts, however desert without the s will also work. L53 as she revolves around ….not revolve around. L57 More flawless and smooth than the top of………..not then the.
    | Posted on 2015-04-15 00:00:00 | by monad | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    200028

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry