It is hard not to wonder exactly what this is about. Generally I have no need for an explanation. This had a nice essence, the softness portrayed was sweet. I suppose this piece was bitter/sweet. Lovely imagery, simplicity, but ending on a note of loss. It creates a longing heart felt emotion. Thank you for sharing.
I agree about the puncuation after doom and gloom bc when I read it I really just want it to be one clear statement.
I like this piece otherwise and had no problem with it, I like the tone created by word choice and imagery.
Carousel of blue light and silent bars of white. I am picturing a multitude of visions, yet quiet, and then you use the word comfortable so that I can view this as peaceful and not overwhelming. I like the way that made me feel.
I like this better without any punctuation at all, then again I don't know, acutely, what it's about.
II like the simple rhymes light/white
doom gloom room
they (it) (all) (everything)
are so close
it goes from potentially being cat in the hat type stuff
to electrifying poetry with a zoom lens.
An I like the potentiality here, seems autobiographical.
I think that a good life comes without pressure. I mean if you had everything you wanted blah blah blah
but it's when you don't that you are forced to get out your pen and evolve.
Anyway, I really like your stuff, I might not get it (as you know it) or like every single piece (but generally i do) but you've just got this ability to bring one to light
and so I'd always have a look at your stuff.